To My Ex Best Friend

Hey there,

You probably don't remember me. At least, it sure feels like you don't.

Let me remind you who I am. I was your best friend. And you were mine. We cheered each other on and were there for each other when it felt like the world was against us. Even when we both went away for college, we talked all the time and made sure to hang out when we were home. We saw every Hunger Games movie together. Heck, we even went to prom together.

I guess none of that matters anymore. 

Shortly before this past Christmas, I texted you to check in and maybe try to make a plan to hang out when/if you came home for the holidays. When I asked about you coming home, you said you had moved to another state and didn't know when you would be in town again. 

I was surprised to learn you had moved. What surprised me more was your response when I asked why you never told me.

"You never asked."

That was your answer. Really? Why on Earth would I have ever asked you if you were moving? Who asks that kind of question?

We haven't spoken since that conversation. I'd reach out, but what's the point? You didn't care enough to tell me you were moving, so why would you care how hurt I was? What makes it more obvious that you don't care is the fact that you haven't noticed that I haven't spoken to you since that conversation. I'm kind of tired of our friendship feeling one-sided, so if you want to talk, I'm here. Until then, I wish you the best.
Love,
Your Former Best Friend

To My First College Friend

Dear friend,
You were my very first friend in college. We met through our class Facebook page the summer before freshman year. We exchanged numbers in order to avoid any loneliness in the cafeteria when we got to campus. I bet you don't remember any of that.
When we started becoming close friends that summer before school, I made it known to you that I was kind of scared after a rough experience with a previous guy friend. You promised me you wouldn't do what he did to me. I can tell you don't remember that.

Had you remembered that promise, I wouldn't be writing this.

The first day of orientation, you greeted me with a big hug. You were always there. You were always good about offering hugs and prayers when I needed it.
Junior year, a lot of crazy stuff happened in my personal life. When I finally opened up and told you what was going on, you asked if I was ok. I appreciated that more than you know. You were the first one to ask.
Sometime during senior year, I stopped existing to you. Texts went unanswered. We barely spoke in person. You deleted me from all of your social media. No explanation. No goodbye. Exactly what you said you wouldn't do.
Was it your girlfriend? Did you think I wanted more than a friendship with you? That seems to be a common problem with my guy friends. If that was the case, why didn't you talk to me about it?
A few weeks ago, you got married. Congratulations! I wish I could've been there, just like I wish you'd be there whenever that happens for me.
I do wish you and your new wife all the best. I am genuinely happy for you guys and think you make a great couple.
I just miss you.
Love,
Your former friend.

Why I Don't Get Excited for Wedding Season

Since wedding season has wrapped up, I thought now would be a good time to write this. This is probably going to be one of the most brutally honest and vulnerable posts I have ever written. Based on the title, you probably think this is going to be some rant about being single and seeing wedding pictures on Facebook, but it's not. I do have a wonderful boyfriend, so this isn't about that.
When I went away to college, I met some of the nicest, coolest, sweetest, most fun people I have ever met in my life. For the first time, it felt like I had a real "squad," people who actually enjoyed having me around, and didn't just tolerate me. I had a solid circle of friends.
Throughout my time in college, a lot of people told me to prepare to receive lots of wedding invitations in the years to come. A lot of people get married not long after graduation. I was so ready for it. These people meant a lot to me, I was super happy for them, and I wanted to celebrate with them.
Graduation day was a year and a half ago. Some friends got married before then, and a lot have gotten married since. There have been roughly 25 weddings, and that's only those involving my college friends, some of which where I had been friends with both the bride and the groom. How many of these weddings have I been invited to? One. That's right, 25 weddings and I was only invited to one.
The one wedding I was invited to was that of my roommate from freshman year. Sadly, I was unable to attend due to it being far away, not having a car, and having finals. She said she figured that would happen, but she still invited me. I still have that invitation somewhere among my college stuff.
One friend's wedding happened while we were still in school. When she first got engaged, she had told me I would definitely be invited to her wedding. My best friend and I were both invited to her bachelorette party and her baby shower, but neither of us were invited to her wedding.
Many times when I talk about this subject with friends they say, "Well maybe it was a small venue and they could only invite so many people?" Look, I understand that kind of thing. The problem is, many times when photos from these weddings surface online, everyone else we knew in college is there. It's hard not to feel left out. And it's kind of hard to believe that out of 25 weddings, only one had enough space for me.

65 Things to be Thankful For

It's November and it's almost Thanksgiving! I know a "what I'm thankful for" post seems super cliche, but I was inspired by a friend of mine. My friend, Kendall, is currently working on a 10,000 things to be thankful for project. She posted on Facebook asking everyone to list the things they're thankful for so she can compile a list of 10,000 things. Now, I'm not going to list 10,000 things, I don't have that kind of time, but I am going to list 65 things (in no particular order), just in case you're having trouble creating your own list this year.
1. My family
2. My friends
3. My loving boyfriend
4. My friends
5. My dog
6. Belmont Abbey College (where I went to college)
7. The St. Joseph Adoration Chapel (at Belmont Abbey)
8. Immaculate Conception Church (where I go to church)
9. My job
10. My students
11. My co-workers
12. Music
13. Books
14. Coffee
15. Sunshine
16. Rainbows
17. Flowers
18. Snow
19. Parks and Recreation (my favorite show)
20. The Sound of Music (my favorite movie)
21. Ladybugs
22. Christmas
23. Food
24. A place to live
25. Theatre
26. Soft blankets
27. Taylor Swift
28. Sunsets
29. Mountain views
30. Peanut butter
31. Marvel movies (RIP Stan Lee)
32. Disney everything
33. Muscadine wine
34. The color of the leaves in the fall
35. Living in the south
36. The Catholic Church
37. Dolphins
38. Turtles
39. Campfires
40. The internet
41. Thrift stores
42. Spontaneous adventures with friends
43. Glitter
44. Musicals
45. Julie Andrews
46. The ocean
47. Seashells
48. Stars
49. My education
50. Past teachers
51. Arts in education
52. Holidays
53. Paid holidays
54. Time off from work
55. No longer working at the grocery store
56. Sleep
57. Lotion (my hands get so dry this time of year)
58. Coats
59. Scarves
60. Gloves
61. Heat
62. Air conditioning
63. My home
64. My car
65. My life