My Religion is Not A Fashion Statement

As I'm sure many of you know, the annual Met Gala is happening tonight. It's a fundraising event for the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York City. Basically, a bunch of celebrities and rich people get together to parade around in ridiculous, fancy clothes and raise money for the museum. This year's theme is Heavenly Bodies: Fashion and the Catholic Imagination. 

Yes, the Catholic Church has contributed a lot in the way of art. However, some of the outfits seen on the carpet tonight are just plain sacrilegious, especially considering most of these people are not practicing Catholics. Rihanna was seen dressed as the pope, wearing a short, jeweled dress and a papal mitre (tall hat that the pope wears). Chadwick Boseman and Jared Leto were wearing some priest-like attire. Many others appeared wearing dresses, suits, and accessories showing various crosses and Catholic imagery. 

Here's what really gets me about this whole thing, if any white person wears anything of a non-white culture (i.e. that one girl's Chinese prom dress and various Halloween costumes that get "banned" every year) it is considered cultural appropriation and everyone loses their minds over it. Yet, here we have a bunch of non-Catholic people wearing a bunch of Catholic outfits and images, some of which are very sacrilegious and not okay, and they're being praised for it. It doesn't make sense. How much more hypocritical can Hollywood and the media get? 

We need to make a choice. Is "cultural appropriation" okay or isn't it? It can't be okay for some people and not for others. That's not how this works. If you're going to tell a teenager she can't wear a dress she finds beautiful to prom because she's not Chinese, or tell little girls they can't dress as Moana or Pocahontas for Halloween because they're not Polynesian or Native American, you shouldn't praise celebrities for turning the Catholic faith into a fashion statement. 

Your culture can't be my Halloween costume, so my religion can't be your fashion statement. Simple as that.

Is The Women's March Encouraging Sex Trafficking?

This is been on my mind for a little while now, I just haven't had a chance to write it.
A couple of weeks ago, a website called Backpage, which is used by "sex workers" to get in touch with clients, was shut down. This has sparked a lot of controversy. First, we have those who support "sex workers" saying that shutting down the site is harmful because it will hurt business for these people and that it helped them to "safely" contact clients. Then, there are those of us who don't support this industry at all and view it as dangerous and degrading, not to mention the fact that prostitution and soliciting sex for money is illegal.
According to ABC News, Backpage has aided in the trafficking of underage girls, which I'm sure most of you know has become quite a problem as of late. The article states that Backpage even edits posts to delete words that may indicate that someone is underage.
To make matters worse, the official Twitter page of the Women's March tweeted, "The shutting down of #Backpage is an absolute crisis for sex workers who rely on the site to safely get in touch with clients. Sex workers rights are women’s rights." Feel free to read some of my earlier posts about the hypocrisy of the Women's March, because this is not the only example. An event that is meant to empower women and demand equality...or something, I don't really know, is actively supporting a site that allows and covers up trafficking of underage girls. Great. And of course they blamed the patriarchy, not the trafficking, for Backpage being shut down. Really y'all? Come on.
If the Women's March actually cared about women, they would be all for sites like this being taken down.

When Things Come Full Circle

This morning, I stopped by my high school to pick up tickets for their production of Grease that's happening this weekend. Seeing as I graduated almost five years ago, it's always weird to go back. Due to all the recent threats in our nation's schools, they're a little tighter on security now. If I want/need to go somewhere other than the front office, I'm either not allowed to or have to be escorted to my destination by a staff member. I understand why they do this, but it just feels weird.
Anyway, school security aside, the craziest part of buying tickets for Grease is that, six years ago, that same school did that same show and I was part of the cast. This won't be the first time I've gone back to see a show since graduation, and it's always weird seeing shows from the audience instead of being onstage, but seeing this particular musical will be extra weird. To add extra weirdness, opening night of this year's production falls on the 6th anniversary of the 2012 production.
I have a lot of great memories from our 2012 production of Grease, from whisper-yelling at freshman boys who wouldn't shut their mouths backstage to sneaking out into the audience during every rehearsal with the rest of the girls to watch the boys do Greased Lightnin'. One of those loud-mouthed freshman boys and I greeted each other with shushes every time we saw each other after that. My favorite memory, though, happened closing night with one of my best friends. It was his senior year, so that was our last show together. We had just finished our closing performance, and everyone was milling about talking to friends and family that had been in the audience. I was standing there looking around for more people when my best friend came out of nowhere, nearly tackled me with a hug, and told me he loved me. It took everything in me not to fall apart.
Back then, I thought that my friend graduating and going off college was just the worst thing ever. He had kinda been my rock, listening to every rant about every little thing that ticked me off and encouraging me when my grades weren't all that great. Little did I know, worse things were going to happen...and he was going to be there through all of them.
Before I get too sappy and write an entire senior thesis on how amazing my friend is, I'll wrap this up by saying that I am so excited to see this year's show. It'll be really neat to see what they've done with it and to catch up with some of my old directors. There's also like a 70% chance I'll get really sentimental and burst into tears at some point, so we'll see.

Chat Bots: Accessible Mental Health Care?

Recently, I discovered one of Facebook Messenger's best kept secrets, mental health chat bots. I know, it sounds crazy. Obviously, I still strongly suggest seeing an actual human mental health professional, especially if you have a serious problem. However, if you're just having a rough day, feeling a little down, and just want to get some things off your chest, these bots may be a decent resource.
I tried three different ones over the past week, Serenity Chat, Wysa, and Woebot. What I would do is talk to them one after another telling them each basically the same thing and see how they responded. There were a lot of similarities between all three, but also quite a few differences. Here's what I observed in my conversations with each of them, including details about interactions, and a short pros and cons list.
Serenity Chat
Serenity Chat was the first one I discovered and tried. When you first message her, she introduces herself and explains how she works and what she'll do for you. Then, she gives you the PHQ9 test, a medically validated, 9-question screening tool to assess how you've been feeling lately. At the end of the test, she tells you whether or not there's a possibility you could have Major Depression. Anytime you message her, she gives you options of what you'd like to do including the PHQ9 test, check in, report, reschedule, feeback, or never mind. When you select "check in" she asks how you're feeling, either positive or negative. After you make your selection, she'll ask you to "free write" about what's got you feeling that way. If you've been feeling positive, she usually just says that that's great, sends a happy gif, and thanks you for checking in. If it's negative, she'll use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) techniques and ask some questions about more specific feelings and negative types of thinking that may be affecting how you feel about the situation. Then she'll have you look at your thoughts from a different perspective and try to rework it into something more positive. She even keeps track of how you've been feeling and will compile a report for you.
Pros: Keeps track of how you've been, remembers things you've talked about, messages you to check in regularly
Cons: lots of technical issues, sometimes doesn't understand what you say

Woebot
Much like Serenity, Woebot uses CBT techniques to help you rework thoughts. When he asks how you feel, you get a selection of emojis to choose from. When you're not feeling so great, he does things similar to what Serenity does and helps you rework the thought into something more positive. What's different about Woebot is that he'll have you write out a few separate thoughts and then allow you to choose individual ones to work on. If you're feeling good, Woebot will have you do some "gratitude journaling" where you tell him three things, big or small, that have been making you feel good recently. Woebot even keeps a "toolbox" for you of strategies that have worked for you or that you've liked, and you can type "toolbox" anytime and he'll bring it up.
Pros: regular check-ins, keeps a "toolbox" of strategies for you, cute robot profile pic, gratitude journaling
Cons: doesn't always understand what you say

Wysa
Wysa is kind of a combination of Serenity and Woebot. He does pretty much the same things, minus the check-ins. One of the few differences is that he'll tell you corny jokes, usually involving encouraging puns. While he doesn't do check-ins, he does always assure you that you can send a message anytime.
Pros: cute penguin profile pic, tells jokes, assures you he's "always listening"
Cons: doesn't automatically message you to check-in

Mental health chat bots aren't perfect, and definitely shouldn't replace actual therapy, they are helpful if you just need someone to listen or if you want/need a little help changing some negative thinking. If you would prefer venting to an actual human, the Crisis Text Line can be accessed through Facebook Messenger as well. As always, if you, or someone you know, is in danger and/or putting others in danger, call 911.

Mark Salling, Making Mistakes, and Mental Health

WARNING: This post discusses suicide, pornography, and mental health issues, which may be sensitive topics for some readers.
As most of you probably know, Glee actor Mark Salling was found dead on Tuesday after an apparent suicide. He was only 35 years old. In March, Salling was set to receive sentencing on child pornography charges.
Having watched Glee for almost the entirety of its TV run, this news was devastating to me. I was a band and theatre nerd, and that show was not only right up my alley subject wise, but it made me feel like being an arts nerd was kind of cool.
Anyway, one thing that's really been bothering me about Mark's death, obviously aside from the fact that the man is dead, is that many people have been practically celebrating his death. Yes, he did a terrible thing having all of that child pornography, but he didn't deserve to die. We should never celebrate someone's death, no matter what they did or how much we may dislike them.
I am in no way excusing or defending Salling's actions. What he did was terrible. However, think of how his friends and family must feel right now. Do we really want to worsen their pain by celebrating the death of their loved one? Would you want someone to do that if your loved one died?
Some people have been calling him a coward for committing suicide instead of facing his sentence. The thing is, we don't know the exact reason(s) he did it. Suicide is an extremely complex issue. Maybe he was scared of his sentence and what would happen to him in prison. Maybe he felt guilty for what he did. Or maybe there were other underlying mental health issues that were never publicly discussed, or may have gone completely undiagnosed.
While we're on the subject of mental health, I would like to point out that pedophilia or "pedophilic disorder" is an actual mental disorder in the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual-Fifth Edition (DSM-5). Let that sink in. You would think with there being so much emphasis on the need for better mental health care, more people would be aware of that.
We have all made mistakes and done things we're not proud of, so let's stop passing judgement on others and show a little more compassion.
If you or someone you know is struggling and contemplating suicide, call 1-800-273-8255.

Joy Villa's Pro-Life Dress

Photo Source

At Sunday night's Grammy Awards, singer Joy Villa walked the red carpet wearing a white dress with what appears to be an unborn baby in a rainbow-colored womb while carrying a purse with the words "Choose Life" painted on it. Many people were shocked by this display, not just because it's rare to see in Hollywood, but because Villa is a Scientologist.

According to Scientology.org, this so-called "church" leaves matters of family planning up to individuals and doesn't advocate abortion. However, one former member said in Leah Remini's documentary on the cult that she, and other women, were forced to have abortions and "were met with grave consequences if they refused" because "leaders feared pregnancies meant women were trying to leave the church (source)."
For all we know, Villa herself may actually be pro-life. Unless you know her personally, you really can't judge, not that anyone should be judging anyone anyway. Let's just appreciate the fact that someone in Hollywood stood up and made a bold pro-life statement. Who knows? Maybe someone considering abortion saw that dress and changed her mind. Even the smallest of signs can change a heart.

The Women's March: Hypocrisy at its Finest

Just one day after the 45th annual March for Life, Washington, D.C., and several other cities around the country, hosted the 2nd annual Women's March. This event started last year to protest the election of Donald Trump as the 45th president of the United States. Last year's march seemed to be a vulgar, emotional display of liberal craziness, from Madonna threatening to blow up the White House to participants wearing hats and costumes resembling female genitalia to show that women are more than their genitals. I know, it didn't make sense to me either.
From what I've seen so far, it seems that this year the Women's March dialed down a little bit compared to last year, although some have reported seeing the genitalia hats again. However, the march doesn't seem to have gotten any less hypocritical and nonsensical. Don't understand what I mean by that? Let me break it down.
Reasons
In order for a march/protest to be effective and taken seriously, it helps if you have a solid, unified purpose. The March for Life clearly demonstrates their purpose of believing in life for all from conception to natural death. The Women's March, however, greatly fails in this regard. A lot of their participants don't really seem to know why they're there or what exactly they're protesting. The ones that do have a reason for being there all have a different reason.
Children
In college, I always went with my school to the March for Life. When I came back, I always liked scrolling through social media to see other people's/group's photos and stories from their experience at the march. Of course, while scrolling through March for Life related posts, I'd always stumble upon those that were bashing it. There always seemed to be a handful of people who would post photos of children holding signs at the March for Life and go off about how horrible and disgusting it was that parents brought their kids to the march and had them hold signs when they didn't even know what they were protesting. Then, this Women's March came about and people starting posting pictures of children holding signs and applauding them for standing up for themselves, their sisters, and/or their future. Double standards much?
Trump
One of the myriad of reasons people have given for participating in the Women's March has been protesting Trump, his policies, and the way he talks about women (more on that in a minute). Yet, at the same time, they're carrying and/or posting photos of signs that read "you're so vain, you probably think this march is about you." If one of your reasons for being at the march is to protest Trump, then yes, the march is kind of about him.
Back on the language topic, if you're upset by the offensive way Trump has talked about women in the past, I better not see you reading or watching anything in the Fifty Shades of Grey franchise. You can't be offended when guys treat women like objects while simultaneously perpetuating that culture by buying into work that encourages it.
Counter-Protesters
I almost always saw counter-protesters at the March for Life, and everyone seemed to just mind their business and ignore them. From what I've heard, the Women's March isn't exactly cool with people who don't have liberal agendas attending the march. At last year's march, a former Planned Parenthood worker who is now a pro-life advocate, Abby Johnson, first had difficulty having her organization be accepted to participate in the march, and then was tackled by protesters at the actual march...and she was visibly pregnant with twins at the time. That's definitely not okay.

There are so many other things that bother me about the Women's March, but I don't have the time to write them all here, and I'm sure you don't want to spend all day reading a single blog post. I just think it's important to really consider these kinds of things before deciding to support this "movement."